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| 08:25pm 14/12/2005 |
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 Dear Santa...
Dear Santa,
This year I've been busy!
In February I committed genocide... Sorry about that, ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) xcultureceasex (-5000 points). Last Sunday I gave change to a homeless guy (19 points). Last week I saved a busload of nuns in Angola (326 points). In March sullenzero and I robbed a bank (-50 points). In May I caught a purse-snatcher who stole aaronrockshard's purse (30 points).
Overall, I've been naughty (-4675 points). For Christmas I deserve a spanking!
Sincerely,
animallibchik |
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| 12:41pm 06/12/2004 |
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mood:  sick music: the killers/smile like you mean it
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so...mates of state friday! cant wait.can not wait. |
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| 11:41pm 31/05/2004 |
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by the way,friends only from now on. |
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| 08:10pm 29/05/2004 |
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oh man....approximately one hour ago i was THE most childish 19 year old on the planet. haha i honestly cant even believe it. over a card game. with my grandmother. haha. oh goodness... |
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| 08:48pm 09/05/2004 |
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mood:  annoyed music: fiona apple
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i really love when customers ( who are also complete strangers) like to comment on my mood. i would like to go to work for at least onneee day without someone saying "are you ok?", "smile!,it aint that bad hun",or "whats wrong with you?". i mean...they dont even know me. who gives them the right to tell me how to feel? and am i really that transparent? i mean whats to smile about while making a smoothie? i smile when it is an appropriate time to smile, which i do often. but god forbid i dont smile while im actually making the damn smoothie. other than that...my day was fine.
the past few night i have been having crazy crazy dreams. the first one i am not repeating. the second one though was just really weird. i was walking to my friend adam deludes house in chicago which ive never been to. but i was actually walking what looked like the california coast. and there were tons of people walking..it looked like a marathon or something. and then one level up there was another walkway with all of these showers and all sorts of city-looking people. but the weird part was i was walking naked,while carying a novel behind my back to cover only my bum. and no one else walking seemed to care. but i kept forgetting things on the way there so i kept having to turn around and go back but when i turned around i went to the second level through all of the showers and stuff,but never actually went into the shower. and it just repeated like that. never really made it to adams. SO WEIRD. just thought i would share. haha. |
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| 09:20pm 08/05/2004 |
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man....what the crap. that is all. |
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| 10:43pm 07/05/2004 |
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mood: torn music: anniversary
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so...basically i shopped until i dropped today. definitely took my mind off of things for a little while at least. im really tan right now. kind of really liking it. bumped into cor bear in the beginning of my little shopping trip. we ate. yucky food. thats about it. oh and i went on this bungee thingy after work with my friend brian. it was so much fun! totally want to do it again.i will most likely on sunday. ah well. man im so bummed. |
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| we liiiieeeeeee in so many words.... |
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| 06:18pm 28/04/2004 |
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mood:  happy music: piebald
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mates of state was sooooo good last night! it was a short set,but definitely a good one. i wish i could see them again. you could tell they were so in love even after all this time...it was nice to see. and she is expecting a baby. she looked so cute with her little (well i should say huge) baby bump! anyway crystal and i left after mates of state to meet up with brendan who couldnt get in because he didnt have an ID on him. i finished the book i got yesterday. i liked it, but not as much as the others. the ending left me a little unsatisfied. i am going to get the second one though. i want my friend nicole to read it. OC tonight! caaantt wait! and no work tomorrow. my mission is to find a way to get around 80 dollars tomorrow because my stupid insurance company likes to spring up bills out of their asses. so i dont know how i am going to do this. but oh well. ill figure it out. ok dinner time. ugh...im not even hungry. |
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| 10:55pm 26/04/2004 |
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mood:  disappointed
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i hate this. i really do. seriously...im not cut out for this.fajfajoiijfasjfasifsai jfjisafijfjas!!!!!!!!!!! what was i thinking, and how could i have been so naive? |
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| 06:17pm 26/04/2004 |
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man...some people just have no hearts. today while i was working, i saw a little girl from a distance who was holding a balloon that she was obviously psyched about having. only,she tripped while walking, and the balloon drifted up toward the glass roof. her eyes automatically started welting up with tears. i felt awful, so i went over to customer service where i saw they had balloons so i could replace the long gone one. but the customer service lady was all " it's a dollar donation for the balloon, sorry". at that time, i had spent the money i had on me for a book. so, i couldnt donate the dollar for the balloon. but i mean jesus christ, it's just a fucking balloon! i dont know..shit like that just bothers me. this entry is pointless.
anyway, other than that...i bought a SUPER good book today called "when in rome". i finished it by the end of my shift. it was so good. also, i went to the c.d payne website and they have yet ANOTHER nick twisp book out which i peed my pants over i was so excited (well not really..but i couldve). it's called "cut to the twisp", and i guess it's his entries in the lab book II. so i ordered it. i enoy reading all of these books because i can get lost in them and it takes my mind off of reality,yet i also learn a lot from them too, and use what i have learned into my own life. |
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| 12:05am 26/04/2004 |
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i want to love again so badly. i want to take care of someone and be there for them and know they feel the same way about me. someone that honestly feels that way. so,santa, can i have that for my birthday? haha. maybe i should cancel my livejournal account... |
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| ok i really need to stop with the modest mouse lyrics....but this is just how i feel right now |
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| 10:02pm 25/04/2004 |
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mood: hopeful
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Ice-age heat wave, can't complain.
If the world's at large, why should I remain?
Walked away to another plan.
Gonna find another place, maybe one I can stand.
I move on to another day,
to a whole new town with a whole new way.
Went to the porch to have a thought.
Got to the door and again, I couldn't stop.
You don't know where and you don't know when.
But you still got your words and you got your friends.
Walk along to another day.
Work a little harder, work another way.
Well uh-uh baby I ain't got no plan.
We'll float on maybe would you understand?
Gonna float on maybe would you understand?
Well float on maybe would you understand?
The days get shorter and the nights get cold.
I like the autumn but this place is getting old.
I pack up my belongings and I head for the coast.
It might not be a lot but I feel like I'm making the most.
The days get longer and the nights smell green.
I guess it's not surprising but it's spring and I should leave.
I like songs about drifters - books about the same.
They both seem to make me feel a little less insane.
Walked on off to another spot.
I still haven't gotten anywhere that I want.
Did I want love? Did I need to know?
Why does it always feel like I'm caught in an undertow?
The moths beat themselves to death against the lights.
Adding their breeze to the summer nights.
Outside, water like air was great.
I didn't know what I had that day.
Walk a little farther to another plan.
You said that you did, but you didn't understand.
I know that starting over is not what life's about.
But my thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud. |
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| you wasted your life...why wouldnt you waste your afterlife? 'nother lil something from MM. |
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| 11:57pm 24/04/2004 |
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mood:  contemplative music: modest mouse still stuck in my head
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so today was a bore. i had to get a tail lightbulb. while i was there i saw a friend from highschool who works there. it is sometimes nice to bump into people you havent seen in a while.anyway, im so confused about things. about everything. i finally have motivation and i am unable to do anything with it.i want to do something with my life and i dont want to feel alone anymore. i mean things are looking up. i dont know. i shouldnt even feel like this at 19 years old. blah.livejournal brings out the crazyness in me. im not sure if thats a good thing or a bad thing yet. i kind of miss living in dc. maybe it's because it just isnt here. in any case, i miss it. i wish i could go to bed but a certain someone is keeping me up! not that i mind... |
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| if shit makes bliss i feel blissfullly...hahaha ooh MM. |
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| 12:36am 24/04/2004 |
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mood:  excited music: black heart procession
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man...new modest mouse is awesome. love it. today was a really good day. i woke up in a good mood...very refreshed. bought a new book today while at work. it's called p.s i love you by cecilia ahern. it's about this 30 year old madly in love couple and the male partner passes away due to a brain tumor. he always joked that he would make a list before he dies of things he wants her to do when he is gone . but he actually goes through with the list. it's really good. ive already read 193 pages. anyway,after work i headed to zach and jareds. went to the the tragedy/get killed/drop dead show. i only stayed for get killed because i guess i didnt feel worthy of staying for tragedy while there were about 100 kids outside who liked them a hundred times more and werent allowed in. ohhh and i also had a heart to heart with tara. shes a nice gal. saw brendan and danny. i so totally owe danny a birthday grilled cheese. i must do this soon. he also had a mates of state ticket to sell. guess who bought it? OH thats right...me :-) so psyched! i fiiinnaalllyyy get to see them. |
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| outstanding! |
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| 06:02pm 21/04/2004 |
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mood: not too sure music: pretty girls make graves
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hah, i miss him. this is so silly. how can i have these feelings for someone i spent such little time with? should i even be having these feelings? i am usually so good at this. so good at just pushing people away. but no,this one is different. hah. i start to have feelings for someone that is impossible to be with. i dont know..i dont even know what to think. i have tried not thinking for most of the day.i feel so silly. anyway i kept thinking today was tuesday b/c i slept for 18 hours! without waking up to pee or anything! crazy. i missed tv night with jared. and 80s night. i cant believe i slept that long. the last two days have been pretty umm..spontaneous. i ate pepper out of an already licked bowl of ranch dressing. haha due to the dares of brenton and blais. but that doesnt even compare to the blue cheese dressing blais had to eat. yuck. ok not talking about that. we broke down on the highway at around 3:30. under normal circumstances, it would not be fun.especially at 3:30. haha but oh it was. i dont know why, it just was. work was boring today.as usual. my friend came by and dropped off some "dirt cake" that he made for me. it was good, only i could only eat a tiny bit of it. you know the feeling when you're on a rollercoaster and your stomache drops before you do?well i kept getting that feeling all day today, resulting in me not having an appetite. OC tonight! *w00t w00t* cant wait. i hope i dont tear up just from watching the beginning credits like i did last time. oh how i miss california.... |
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| 02:43am 01/04/2004 |
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[Spell your first name backwards]: annaed
[The story behind your user name]: umm i used to be very much into animal liberation.
[Where do you live?]: attleboro
DESCRIBE YOUR:
[Wallet]: umm it's like an old lady change purse...black with two tourquoise hearts on the front from urban outfitters.
[Jewelry worn daily]: my sister bought me a silver tiffanys ring for my birthday and i wear that everyday. i just bought this necklace in cali that i am addicted to.
[Shoes]: i hate sneakers. i try to wear as little as possible on my feet. so winter, ballet flats or my green converse. summer, flip flops.
[Handbag]: i got this tweed bag from victorias secret but the zipper just broke so i bought this other red bag that i dont like too much. i need a new one. anyway, it's big. and red.
[Favorite top]: err...this shirt i just bought at delias...it's striped and it has these two little pockets on the front.
[Perfume/Cologne]: lavender vanilla.
[Piercing]: nose ring. and ears.
[What you are wearing now]: my seven jeans that i am in love with, a pink/purple sweater, a courderouy jacket, and brown flip flops.
[Makeup]: umm you know..basic stuff. although it's all worn off by now.
[On my mind]: billz billz billz. and how much i miss cali. and how much i miss having someone to love.
[Wishing]: ha. too many things my friend.
[Talking to]: will
[Eating]: nothing. im fucking starving though.
[favorite movie]: dont make me answer this.
[something you're looking forward to in the upcoming months]: summer. a romance. my sister coming to visit. seth coming home.
[The last thing you ate?]: friggin...8 tiny bags of pretzels they hand out on planes b/c i had nothing else to eat.
[Something that you are deathly afraid of?]: being in debt.and never being loved.
[Do you believe in love]: uh huh
[Do you believe in soul mates]: most likely. but i dont think you should spend your life trying to find them.
[Do you believe in love at first sight]: yeah but it hasnt happened to me.
[Do you believe in forgiveness]: always forgive,never forget
[What are some of your favorite pig out foods?]: mozzerella sticks. CHOCOLATE.
[What's something you wish you could understand better?]: my aunt margie. she is schitzophrenic and i wish i couldnt understand. and roy ezekiel. how he can be such an awful person.
[Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time?]: vince. although i never really have seen him. i guess i just miss being in touch with him.
In the last 24 hours, have you:
[Cried?]: tonight.
[Gotten sick]: last night and today.
[Eaten?]: yeah if you call it eating.
[Been kissed?]: sadly,no. but i want some kisses.
[Felt stupid?]: no
[told someone you loved them]: yeah
[Met someone new?]: tons
[Moved on?]: sort of
[Talked to an ex?]: yes
[Missed an ex?]: no not really in that way.
[Talked to someone you have a crush on?]: yeah
[Had a serious talk?]: tonight
[Hugged someone?]: yup. jared.
[Fought with your parents?]: eh not really fight. just a little tiff.
[Done something your parents said no to]: umm. no.
[Would you rather be with friends or on a date?]: i wouldnt mind being on a date. but with friends is where it's at.
[Where is the best hangout?]: the drive in.cant wait for summer!
[Do you have a job?]: yup. and a summer camp interview tomorrow. eek. nervous. i hate interviews.
[Do you like being around people?]: depends on the situation i am in.
Who…
[Have you known the longest]: nicole
[Do you argue the most with?]: lately,zach. but usually my mom.
[Do you always get along with?]: most of my friends, eric G
[Is the most trustworthy?]: zach
[Makes you laugh the most?]: seth
[Has been there through all the hard times?]: john
[Has the coolest parents?]: umm i guess zach and jared. i love their parents.
[Has the coolest siblings?]: ha cant answer
[Is the most blunt?]: john
[Is the smartest?]: hah dont know.
Other stuff...
[Who is your role model?]:
[Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with?] yeah :/
[Have you ever cried over the opposite sex?]: unfortunately
[Do you have a "type" of person you always go after?]: hmm not really...i guess i like the mysterious type. i like trying to figure someone out. also, someone who when you look in their eyes you can tell they just have this great soul. i know,sounds silly.
[Ever wanted to get revenge on someone because they hurt you]: i suppose. but what good does that do?
[Rather be the dumper or dumped?]: i dont like either, but i would rather be the dumper. mutual,actually.
[Rather have a relationship or a "hookup"?]: hookups are overrated. they are lame,awkward, and emotionless. so yeah, relationship is much much better.
[Ever liked your best guy/girl friend?]: yeah
[want to get married?]: yeah
[want kids?]: uh huh
[Do you believe you know the person whom you will marry at this point in time?]: no. i mean who ever knows?
[What is your favorite part of your physical appearance?]: eyes
[What is your favorite part of your emotional being?]: not sure
[Are you happy with you?]: for the most part
[Are you happy with your life?]: i dont have too many things to complain about. sure, i have some things i need to change, but for the most part i am happy. |
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| laguna niguel |
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| 08:50am 27/03/2004 |
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in laguna niguel staying with friends of zachs parents. this is probably the most beautiful town we have visited so far. i love it here. just love it. i amin love. |
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| 05:50pm 24/03/2004 |
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so i am in california and it's absolutely beautiful (well northern part is) right now i am in hollywood. went to this record store called amoeba...it has everything there. anyway i have 3 minutes left on the comp. so i have to go. but it's awesome here. |
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| well maybe im just a fool,but i know you are just as cool....and cool kids...they belong together |
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| 11:52pm 14/03/2004 |
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blah. i am so exhausted. i worked open to close today. my legs feel like spaghetti. almost all of my friends are on vacation right now i kentucky,ohio,and florida. but next sunday it will be myyyyyy turn. friday all of my friends had a surprise bday dinner for our friend ty. it was good. then we went to fun and games and i owned at air hockey. pictures will be up soon. saturday everyone left so me and zach went to get some stuff for our trip, then waited 2 hours to eat at olive garden. it was worth it though. man..i have just been feeling so crappy lately about myself and just the decisions i have made in these past few months. it just feels like i dont know who i am anymore. i know that i am a good person and i do good for others and whatnot. i just feel like the personal decisions i have made really suck. im hoping to improve them. zach says im making a big deal out of nothing and that i havent done anything wrong. he's such a good friend. i can tell him anything and he will never ever judge me. i guess thats what friends are for, but i am just so very appreciative of it. i wish things would get better. i really want to find love again. it seems like romance has disappeared out of modern relationships. and thats really sad. well im off to bed. ta ta. |
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